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Wednesday, August 23, 2006
More Dollars than Pence
Posted by Matt
Hi there, this is Matt, the non-Jeni half of Matt and Jeni. Jeni will probably be the primary one posting on this page, but every now and then I'll take a few minutes to chip in my two pence. Today's post won't be very profound, but instead will deal with the daily trivia of money, more specifically, the wide variety of coins you'll encounter over here.

This picture will give you a quick overview:The U.K. has a one pound and a two pound coin.This means that on a college student's budget you will be dealing in coins 90% of the time. In fact, I've heard they exist but I've yet to see a pound note since I've gotten here. Almost all the transactions we make have been in pound coins. It may feel weird at first to have so much monetary power wrapped up in one little coin but you'll get used to it. Although the pound coin is smaller in diameter than a quarter, it is considerably thicker and its bulk helps lend some credibility to its value.Up next is 50p (a.k.a. Fiddy Pent?) 50p is somewhere between the size of a quarter and a 50 cent piece. Its funny shape is kind of cool. Way more common than Big Ones in the states, these are actual coins used regularly.

From Here on Out it Gets Kind of Screwy

I think the only thing more American than apple pie and baseball games is the quarter. When you see ol' George's head on this ubiquitous coin it brings back childhood memories of long summer days, arcade games, ice cream trucks and endless possibilities. The quarter is perhaps the first money of any real, substantial value that we got our grubby little hands on as kids. We're used to pumping quarters into vending machines, jukeboxes, washers and dryers and parking meters. When ever you get change back, it'll be primarily in quarters. 25 cents, two-bits, half a Big One: however you think of it I think it's safe to say that the quarter is a foundational part of the American collective consciousness. Why have on gone on about the quarter for so long? Because upon arriving in the U.K., what shook my belief in the goodness of humanity and the intelligence of our decision to move over here more than anything else was the fact that for some unnatural reason, the Brits decided to subdivide their currency not in to quarters, but into , get this, fifths.Another one of those funny-shaped coins, 20p will have you questioning your foundational assumptions about the world for quite a while until you get used to five of them going into a pound instead of four. But once you get used to that, it turns out they're still quite handy for doing laundry.

Talk About Being Nickeled and Dimed to Death

Turns out, there actually is something more disturbing than the unnaturally derived 20p coin. Take a look at these:Yes, the 10p coin is the big one and the 5p coin is the small one. While this does actually make a lot of sense if you correlate size with value, like every good American should, it goes against years of conditioning with backwards American nickels and dimes. You think I'm making a bigger deal of this than it is? Our first week here Jeni started verbally abusing our dryer and nearly had a nervous breakdown when it kept returning her dime sized 5p coin. "It says you take 10p coins, you stupid piece of....!!!" I'm just warning you, emotional instability brought on by unfamiliar currency is a real danger.

Oh Yeah, and This is a Really Great Idea

Everyone in America has to figure out something to do with their pennies. Whether they just fill up a pocket, couch or jar, pennies certainly seem to be a relic of a bygone financial era. I think pretty much the only reason we have pennies is for the rush of satisfaction you feel when you manage to be able to make perfect change and get rid of them. It must get awfully lonely to be a coin that no one wants. So, in the spirit of compassion, the Brits have given their penny company.Yes, that's two, count them, two, nearly completely worthless coins in the place of the one you were used to in the U.S. And, the 2p is frickin' huge. All it does in your pocket is get in the way and limit your access to coins that are actually useful. Also, gone is the satisfaction of making perfect change and getting rid of these monetary vermin, because when you have to get around the city completely on foot, who wants a pocket full of useless coins janglin' around?

Odds and Ends

I've feel I must repent of my abuse of the penny. While monetarily it is almost worthless, it does carry a portrait of Abraham Lincoln, and like any red-blooded American, I get a warm and woozy feeling all up inside whenever I think about that great statesman. So at least the penny provides the occasional quiet moment of patriotic bliss, if nothing else. Over here, you get the Queen. On every single coin. A whole pocket full of the Queen. The Queen younger, the Queen older, but always the Queen. Occasionally the tails sides have cool things like dragons, but how can you compete with Monticello? Dragon vs. Monticello? Monticello's totally throwin' down. Also, unless I just haven't learned them yet, the coins over here aside from the penny don't have cool names like quarter, nickel, dime or Big One. It's much more cumbersome to ask, "May I get my change back in twenty pence pieces," than it is to ask, "Can I get that back in quarters?"

I bet that's the longest blog post you ever read about coins, huh? Perhaps a future post will cover paper money, or even some more practical matters like opening a bank account. Of course, we haven't been quite able to figure that one out yet, so give us a few weeks.

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